2010: A NASCAR playoff trek

With the close of the NASCAR "regular season", the Chase for the Sprint Cup has begun. This new-fangled playoff format was devised by the NASCAR brain trust some years ago. A complicated points based playoff system, it is supposed to enhance fan excitement for the last 10 races of the year.


This is the evil work of Ivy League MBA consultants, let loose in the hallowed halls of stock car racing.

The regular points system is hard enough to figure out. But in the "Chase" it totally befuddles most casual racing fans. I have one college degree and working on a second; I can barely figure out what the hell is going on. My race loving cousins, who dropped out of the 7th grade, have no chance of comprehension.

Now only the top twelve drivers have a chance to win the championship. The other 30 or so drivers are in a "rebuilding phase" for next year. But the eliminated drivers are still in every race, even though they cannot win a championship. In other sports, the last place team does not get to play in the playoffs. I can smell the corporate idiot-mania here. Twelve drivers are "in it to win it", while 35 drivers are "in it to take up space."

In 2010, the "Chase" contenders are set. There is a problem. Ask any average NASCAR fan to name all twelve of them. You might get four. If I think real hard I might get six. So after drinking myself silly through 26 races, this is the best that I can recall that are in the "Chase"

- Jeff Burton, He is one of my favorites, so I can remember him.

- Denny Hamlin, I only know that, because he won last night's race and the TV squawked for 20 minutes about him being the number one seed.

- Jimmie Johnson, TV commentators will not shut up about his chances of winning a fifth straight championship.

- Clint Bowyer, TV wouldn't shut up about him being the last one to make the cut.

- Jeff Gordon, Next to Jimmie Johnson, the other guy the TV people talk about constantly.

- Greg Biffle, I like him because I think Biffle is a really cool last name.

As for the other six, me and millions of other hard drinking fans will need a nice graphic from ESPN to figure it out.

Redneck Thinking Caps

I have several caps depicting the assigned number of several different NASCAR drivers. But my hats are confusing. Some of them have some years behind them and the driver/number/sponsor no longer match. Number 39, used to be the Interstate Battery, Dale Jarret driven car. Then 39 was the M&M's, Elliot Sadler piloted vehicle, now it is something else entirely. Fuck, I really do not know if there is a 39 this year. Now all my #8, Budweiser, Dale Earnhart Jr. stuff is someone else. And Dale now drives some kinda Mountain Dew car.

This is why rednecks are confused, our thinking caps change more often than Hollywood marriages.

Damn, I wish I still had my #01 Harry Gant, Skoal cap from 1989, or my Morgan Sheppard, Folgers Coffee, #12 cap from 1982.

Life was much simpler back then, I had no concept of calculus.

Dirty Ert